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Has anyone ever considered changing your name?? I have never cared much for my middle name. As most know, my dad is from India and so my middle name is actually an Indian name. In Hindi, this middle name has a positive name- actually means princess.
However, I recently learned that the exact same name has a terribly embarassing name in the Nepal language. Not that it matters.
I talked to my mom about it. My dad actually has the male form of my middle name.
But somehow it really bugs me and bothers me to have this embarassing middle name. For in the remote chance I meet someone familiar w/Nepal, it embarasses me to have this middle name.
Actually changing my name is out, to do so would deeply offend/hurt my dad.
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I'm not crazy about my middle name, but it seems like the only time I use it is when I'm doing taxes or getting a priesthood blessing. My first name is boring, so I've thought before about changing it, but to what? I've had this name for 30 years. My family can't even stop calling me by the nickname I hate, how can they call me by an entirely different name?
Posts: 4332 | Registered: Jul 2004
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I got to change my middle name when I got married. I went from one surname-as-a-middle-name (my mom's last name) to another (my maiden name.)
Honestly the only time it comes up either way is filling out forms (and the forms for birth certs. and such still want my maiden middle and last) and blessings.
I do think looking back it's interesting the relationship I had with my middle name. I had grown resigned to it by the time I was an adult-- but was just as happy to shed it (the determining factor for me was that my maiden middle and my married last start with the same letter and I CANNOT STAND alliteration in names, which is funny, since my maternal grandpa was HHH and my paternal was LLL. Anyway, I don't like it.) So if I hadn't been able to do it pretty pain-free when I got married, would I have changed it? Probably not. But, I probably would never have been in love with it. For that matter, I don't REALLY love having my maiden as my middle name either. But it's better than what I was given at birth (at least in combination with my last.)
So...
I have completely lost track of what my point was now, sorry.
Posts: 8155 | Registered: Aug 2004
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I guess it depends on your feelings for your dad. If you love him and don't want to hurt his feelings, I would keep it as is... Nepal is a really small country, and I don't know anyone of consequence from there... so I think you're safe.
Just your explanation of your name, I found to be fascinating. If you changed it to something more "sensible" your story would be much less fun to listen to...
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Don't have a middle name, and the first name is really just a title. I rarely use it in casual company. I have sometimes thought that I'd like my name to be a bit more evocative, something like "Sidious" or "Tyranus" or even "Maul."
Posts: 831 | Registered: Aug 2008
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My legal name is Patricia, but I go by Patty in everything that doesn't require Patricia legally. I've thought often of changing it just to Patty. I once asked my mom about changing it, but she didn't sound too happy with the idea. Still someday I may still change it. It's a pain in the neck.
What I find funny is that my parents never planned on calling me Patricia. It was always the plan to call me Patty.
Posts: 4979 | Registered: Sep 2002
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I have often wondered why people don't like their names. Someone should propose a law that when you turn 25 or 30 everyone must re-register their birth name and get a new birth certificate. That way you can change your name to whatever you want after you have thought about it for 20 years.
BTW: I like the name "Patricia." It sounds very feminine to me. Funny how that works.
Posts: 11596 | Registered: Nov 2000
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I changed my name for a few years simply because the band I was in had thre guys with the same name (Michael). I thought it would look silly in print, so I volunteered to be one to change my name. I always liked the idea of having an Irish, somewhat androgynous name, so for eight years I was known as "Kelly". the funny thing is that, it's been 15 years since I've been a performer, yet I still know people who will only call me by my stage name (it makes the calls to the house easy to keep track of; Mrs. Madd knows if anyone calls for Kelly, it's definitely an "old friend" ).
I always felt sorry for Mrs. Madd... she met me as "Kelly", and then had to get used to calling me "Michael" Posts: 1885 | Registered: Aug 2005
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I changed my name to what it is now, simply to abandon the middle names I used to have, it isn't a big deal, I still have the same first name, the former middle names still exist on my birth certificate and even on Church records, though they are not used, I just don't have to fill them out on forms or hear them spoken in blessings again.
Posts: 4584 | Registered: Feb 2005
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quote:because the band I was in had thre guys with the same name
What? You didn't want to be the hard rock version of Duran Duran?
Nita, CrowDaughter's middle name is a family name. It's her aunt's middle name, and the first name of her grandmother, great-grandmother; you get the idea. But if she ever goes to a Spanish-speaking country, it means a part of your anatomy that isn't typically mentioned. For her, I hope the history behind her name overcomes everything else.
Posts: 3867 | Registered: Jul 2001
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Thanks for all the good reasons. This did make me think the next time that I have a blessing, I will see if I can have it w/o my middle name mentionned.
The definition in Nepal is actually pre-pubescent virgin, and that is why hearing my middle name now makes me shudder. But again, the Hindu version- princess- did make me happy until a couple days ago.
Posts: 8587 | Registered: Feb 2005
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My middle name is my Grandmothers maiden name. It is also a man's name. It can be said as a female name with a different accent. For years I let people assume the feminine. But it's not my name. I use my middle name properly now. I love it.
My first name drove me nuts the whole time I was growing up. I didn't mind the name. I minded that no one had ever heard of it and that they were always getting it wrong or teasing me about my weird name. I actually answered to a couple other names just because people made the mistake so often. Now 1/3 of all girls have my name.
Even though my name is dirt common now, I appreciate growing up with it because the only two people I knew with that name were me and a wonderful Irish ancestor of mine. I was proud of her.
Posts: 7970 | Registered: Jun 2005
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I always wanted to change my name, but could never figure out what to change it to. My "official" name is Cynthia, but no one calls me that except for the previously mentioned formal use. I hate Cynthia. I never liked Cindy all that much either, especially since I was born in the year of the Cindy and there were dozens of us in school.
I kept my married name after the divorce so that I would have the same last name as my kids, but now that they're grown, I've considered changing back to my maiden name. But after 30 years with this last name, I'm not so sure I want to make the effort to go back.
My sister's name is Rebecca, but she was Becky to everyone until she went away to college. There, she started using Rebecca, and has been Rebecca ever since. Her wedding was interesting. You could easily divide the room: family and old friends calling her Becky, new friends and coworkers calling her Rebecca. I guess that shows that changing your name doesn't always help -- people tend to stick to what they're used to.
Posts: 1330 | Registered: Jul 2004
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My BIL was always called Kirk has a child. When he went to college he started going by Cal (middle name of Calvin). Since he is the oldest and DH is the youngest he had been going by Cal for a long time. DH and many in the family call him Kirk. I found it interesting when I realized I called him Kirk when talk to anyone in the family and extended family, but Cal when talking to him, his wife or neighbors.
Posts: 4979 | Registered: Sep 2002
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Well my first name, although it's neutral in meaning in American English, means something a little more "adventurous" in English English if I'm allowed the use of an ambiguous euphemism.
However, I just don't care. Let them think what they want.
I did consider using my middle name instead of my first. Not because I was embarrassed about my first name, but just because I thought it might go well with the new, improved me that I thought would happen (didn't). Cut loose the old, and embrace the new. Unfortunately, I had a dream where I announced my decision to my family, and they were all bummed. So I kept using my first name (whatever that is).
Posts: 3390 | Registered: Aug 2003
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quote: The purpose of a middle name is so that you know if you are in trouble or not.
Funny. I've noticed that the press usually refers to murderers using first, middle, and last names, so that is definitely true.
Posts: 3390 | Registered: Aug 2003
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My grandfather had an unusual (except in South Carolina) middle name and it was his father's name and on back supposedly 3 more generations (I've not found proof of that yet). He wanted to pass it on to my father but my very proper grandmother (who had no associations in South Carolina) didn't like the middle name. She outlived him so she won. So my dad finished his life with no middle name.
Can you guess the name?
They were named after Charles Pinckney, who represented South Carolina at the Constitutional Convention.
Posts: 578 | Registered: Feb 2006
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I thought of changing my name to Percival Conrad Villanova once, and then telling people that they named the PCV valve after me.
But it seemed like a lot of work just to have a lame joke handy. And then, what if they stopped using said valve?
Posts: 8601 | Registered: Sep 2002
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quote:Funny. I've noticed that the press usually refers to murderers using first, middle, and last names, so that is definitely true.
Should it really surprise us? The more specific you get about a murderer, the fewer people you potentially offend who share part of the name.
Posts: 831 | Registered: Aug 2008
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I used to go by my actual first name, Barack, but when Obama began using it, I went back to my nickname, Barry.
Okay, I'm just kidding. My real name is Shane, but it's my middle name. I really didn't like my name as a kid, Shane I mean, but I hated my first name even worse (Darren). So I thought I'd like to change my name to the names of kids I liked, like Steve, Mark, or David. Then as I got older, and I finally watched the movie Shane and knew that I had been named after the character in that movie, I kind of began liking my name. I wouldn't change it now. Even if I could change it to Barry.
Posts: 3195 | Registered: May 2006
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I truly dislike my very unusual name, but changing it would be a huge hassle, so I stay with it.
I'd like to color my grey hair too, but as a male I don't want the intitial stares and comments that I'd have to endure.
Posts: 388 | Registered: Jan 2008
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I was named after my two grandfathers. One passed away when my mother was 3 so obviously I never knew him. My Norwegian grandfather passed away when I was 2 so I didn't really know him either.
Since my first name is Norwegian my non-Norwegian grandmother's (his wife's) reaction was, "Why would you name him that?"
That's why I came into this world as "Hans Hansen". That was OK except Americans have a heckuva time pronouncing it correctly; if you want to be completely correct with the Norwegian, then it's "Hahnts Hahntsen"; if you want to compromise and give it an American pronunciation, use the short "a" sound for both first and last name, "Hands Hands-sen". The thing that drives me nuts is when people mix and match, "Hahnts Hands-sen"!
One of my fantasies: gathering together several friends and/or Norwegian missionary friends that I have known over the years, for an organ recital by yours truly. That way (are you ready for this?): Chris Christensen, Lars Larsen, and Knute Knuteson could listen to Hans Hansen play a piece on the organ by Ole Olsen! Posts: 3371 | Registered: Aug 2004
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I've always disliked my first name, and complained about it since I was little. It always offends my mom, who gave me the name because she liked it, and views my dislike of it as a direct repudiation of her. But, there were 11 other boys in my senior class of approximately 350 with the same freaking first name, such that we were all called by our first names all the time. It was annoying.
And, when called by it, even today, I get the vague feeling that the person is talking to someone else. It doesn't sound or feel like me. I thought seriously about changing my name when I got back from my mission, but I wouldn't have gone by my middle name, I'd have had to choose something completely different, and I knew it would be a GIGANTIC hassle for the rest of my life, explaining why I was Paddington for 21 years, and, say, Highbury & Islington for the last 10.
People from high school or grade school: "hey Paddington" Me: "Actually, I go by Marylebone now." Them: "Oh, is that your middle name?" Me: "No." *Awkward silence* Them: "Ooooookaaaaay. Well, see you later."
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Well, when I put on my Viking costume at Halloween I change my name to one of the historical Viking names: Thorfinn Skullsplitter. Posts: 3371 | Registered: Aug 2004
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"Young Blood, son of Young Blood"? Sounds very Viking-ish!
Danish can be wild sometimes. The Danish composer, Carl Nielsen, gave his Symphony No. 4 the title "Inextinguishable", which in Danish comes out as "Uudslukkelige", pronounced something like "oo-ood-sloog-lee-ah"!
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My father named three of his sons with really nice first names, and short middle names. Then called us by the middle name. Delvan Dee, Alden Ron, Arlon Dick. (me). My oldest brother is Ned Quinn. (When he was small, he said his name was Quinn Mr. H......Ned!
I HATED MY NAME. You know, "Dick the Prick"!! I guess if my name had been Richard, Dick would be OK.
When I went into the Army, they required first name, middle initial. I found that I liked my first name, so after the service I introduced myself to all my new friends as Arlon. I never retruned to my home to live, so the only ones who call me Dick are Valley people. It never occured to me to change my name.
Posts: 671 | Registered: Sep 2001
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What I think is bad is giving females a totally male first and middle name. This happened to an elderly lady at my work. She has a good attitude and shrugs it off. She just tells people that her parents wanted her to be a boy, thus when she was born they gave her a first and middle name that are both clearly male. [ie something like Ron Kevin LAST NAME].
To see her name written down, you'd think she was a guy.
At the time I worked w/her, how I wanted to encourage this 80 something lady that she could change her name.
Posts: 8587 | Registered: Feb 2005
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My parents didn't give any of my sisters middle names, so that our maiden names will become our last names. I have decided that if I am still single in a year (when I turn 32) I am going to give myself a middle name. I haven't decided what it will be yet, but I want a middle name, dangit!
nitasmile, that's funny. At my retirement home, I worked with a man whose first and middle names were ones that at one point were masculine names, but now are generally considered to be feminine. (Ashley and Lesley, but I can't remember which was the first and which was the middle name) He went by Jack, which was funny since his last name was Frost.
Posts: 109 | Registered: Jun 2001
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I legally changed my name about, uh, 11 or 12 years ago. I kept my first name, ditched the middle and last, gave myself two new middle names and a new last name.
My primary reason was to make it more difficult for the parents to find me while also making it easier for me to rebuild myself. Psychologically, it helped. Tremendously. Not that I suggest it for everyone - that's a personal decision. But for me? Oh yea! And I hated the old name. Hated hated hated hated hated. But then, that also comes from the shrill mother voice yelling out all names... Yeck!
Before I changed it, I discussed my decision with some people very close to me - my favourite aunt and uncle and cousin. They were incredibly supportive to the point of suggesting names within seconds of me bringing this up. Then, after picking out the names, let them sit for a few years to make sure I wasn't going to regret the decision.
And I haven't. Not for one moment. Posts: 4306 | Registered: Apr 2003
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As a child, I hated the unusualness of my name. I forever wanted to be Susie, or Amy, or Jenny.
Now, I don't mind it as much. I certainly never hear my name called in public and respond to it incorrectly. It's always me they are referring to.
I dislike my middle name greatly, but I just use the middle initial. When I have blessings, I hear it. Other than that, it never comes up.
I did go to court when I was 16 to change my last name to the last name of my stepfather, who had never legally adopted me but had been my fater since I was 5. I has always gone by it anyway, but I guess that was just to make it official.
Posts: 4312 | Registered: Jan 2003
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quote: The purpose of a middle name is so that you know if you are in trouble or not.
Isn't that the truth! My mom would start calling me nicely, by my first name, then if I didn't answer she would add my middle name, and I knew I was really in trouble when she added the last name. Posts: 1305 | Registered: Jun 2001
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Willard Richards was Joseph Smith's secretary, and was one of the men in Carthage jail at the time of the martyrdom. I've always liked the story of his proposal of marriage.
As a missionary in England, he fell in love with an English convert, no relative of his, called Jenetta Richards. So he asked her, "Jenetta, I think Richards is the best name in the world, and I don't ever want to change it. Do you?"
And she didn't. So she married him. I love that story! Posts: 1385 | Registered: Oct 2005
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quote:I am going to give myself a middle name. I haven't decided what it will be yet, but I want a middle name, dangit!
I think you should have a contest here on Nauvoo.
I call everyone by the middle name of Lou. When I'm in a teasing mood, I'll call them by their first name and tag Lou on the back of it--Kelly Marie, becomes Kelly Lou. If the first name is one syllable, then I add Lou-Who--Dawn Marie becomes Dawn Lou-Who.
Posts: 3150 | Registered: Sep 2006
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I actually met someone once named Cindy Lou.
For some reason, she was not a fan of "How The Grinch Stole Christmas."
I lack a middle name, but I'm in no rush to adopt one. In particular, Darth Lou Vader just doesn't work for me.
Posts: 831 | Registered: Aug 2008
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